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Mexicans Don’t Kill People… Ranchero Does And I thought rap was horrible…
Ranchero, the ear bleeding Latin music genre from Mexico, is like Mexican country music, shitty music in Spanish, but worse, o so much worse. An accordion, the heart and soul of Ranchero, is the main instrument of choice, and probably the worst instrument ever made, your better off playing a harp then that shit, but if your goal is to annoy, accordion your best bet. It is played in every Ranchero song, AND IT NEVER STOPS PLAYING!!! It just plays the same annoying thing OVER AND OVER AGAIN!!! It is then accompanied by a shitty tuba melody, and tons of shitty Mexican singers who can’t sing for shit. If that doesn’t sound bad enough for you to rip you brains out in hope of death, it gets worse. All Ranchero songs sound the same, and they actually have awards for Ranchero at the Latin Grammy’s, and even RANCHERO FESTIVALS!!! It’s horrible, and if that’s not bad enough, they actually have NON-STOP RANCHERO STATIONS!!! That’s right; someone somewhere actually gave air space to a bunch of Mexicans with no taste in music! And they even get paid for it, how inhumane. They get paid for the torture of others. I for one think it’s an undercover scheme to take over the world. Music that bad can’t be for entertainment. It has to be used for mind control to take over the world. Or perhaps a torture device on mankind to wipe out all other existence until they make a world where only Ranchero is played, a place called Mexico. Bush said there where weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, bullshit, there in Mexico. It’s Time to start bombing any place from which Ranchero is spawned. And then we can live freely. If you’re still not convinced that any music is terrible enough to make all who listen prey for an untimely death, think again. See if you can listen to this without crawling on the ground in agony while trying to find something to kill yourself with. Now you’re either dead or convinced that Ranchero is the most unholy music ever made. I’m considering outlawing accordions and sending all who make such hellish music to an island from which they will never be rescued, Hawaii. Screw ‘em, they have too many nice things, time for suffering. I really need to put this sign on the border…
The death tolls from Ranchero are truly staggering, and they are only rising. Do your part in your community by STOPPING RANCHERO!!! This way there will be no All-Ranchero Stations, and we can stop the suffering. Oh, the unspeakable horror that is Ranchero…
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